Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
