They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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