just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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