Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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