just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
