there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
