i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
