the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
