Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
