I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
