After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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