Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
