He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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