i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
