Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
