I bet he comes in French.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I want a musical about memes.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
