i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He shit in the fireplace
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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