I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
