Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
