Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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