no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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