the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
