I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
