you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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