Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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