I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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