That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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