Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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