dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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