Dual....:-)
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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