We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
