my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
