Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
