What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
