Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
