Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
