Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
