hell yes lets make some ravioli
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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