All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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