if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize