All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
