Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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