What a fucking waste of an outfit
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
