He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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