i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
