Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
