that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
