Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize