Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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