Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
