weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Randomize
