Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
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